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Dignity – The Needs’ Year (Week 14)

Dignity – The Needs’ Year (Week 14)

“Damn it, Jocke! You're the best friend I have. I love you!" My friend was very drunk and I was a sober person during that period of my life. I felt embarrassed and mumbled something in response, trying to avoid the discomfort. He obviously wanted contact and I myself...

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Meaning – The Needs’ Year (Week 13)

Meaning – The Needs’ Year (Week 13)

A few years ago, I rented a working space with some other people for a while. Once a month I gave an introductory lecture to NVC. Each time there was a varied number of participants, sometimes as many as 20 people. At one occasion, only a single person came. After a...

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Harmony – The Needs’ Year (Week 12)

Harmony – The Needs’ Year (Week 12)

An association that comes to mind when I think of the need for harmony is a Buddhist monk sitting in silent meditation up in a mountain monastery. The wind is blowing, everything is still, all movements are slow. Life seems calm, simple and predictable. The lack of...

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Trust – The Needs’ Year (Week 11)

Trust – The Needs’ Year (Week 11)

"We will compensate for the damage!" The words came out of me without a second thought. I was one of the organisers of last year's European NVC Summer Festival and a few of the children had gone berserk. An armchair was destroyed. The pool table was broken. The place...

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Mourning – The Needs’ Year (Week 10)

Mourning – The Needs’ Year (Week 10)

A few weeks ago I heard that one of my oldest friends had died because of a stroke. At first I became mute and cold. We shared our time intensely for a few years during the second half of the 80's. After that, we didn’t meet often, but occasionally, with a few years...

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Safety – The Needs’ Year (Week 9)

Safety – The Needs’ Year (Week 9)

I am writing this blog post on Monday 28 February 2022. I’m sitting in my living room in my apartment in Tensta, a northern suburb in Stockholm, Sweden. Opposite me sits Magda writing something on her computer. Outside the window the sun is shining. It is a few...

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Integrity – The Needs’ Year (Week 8)

Integrity – The Needs’ Year (Week 8)

"What are you doing? The finishing line is here!” Kay shouted and gestured which track I should take. I had just covered 40 km on cross-country skis, but instead of crossing the finishing line, I took an extra lap in the stadium. The ski race went three laps and the...

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Mutuality – The Needs’ Year (Week 7)

Mutuality – The Needs’ Year (Week 7)

The importance of mutuality "Ha, ha, ha… You will look back at this moment and see the humour in it all." I had just shared something vulnerable and my friend was laughing. It is possible that he was right. Maybe, sometime in the future, I will look at this event with...

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To matter – The Needs’ Year (Week 6)

To matter – The Needs’ Year (Week 6)

We are in the entry hall in our apartment in Järna, south of Stockholm. My partner is lying on an ambulance stretcher and is supported by our midwife to give birth to our son. In the background are two ambulance drivers waiting. The birth started so fast that we never...

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Growth – The Needs’ Year (Week 5)

Growth – The Needs’ Year (Week 5)

Bodily awareness I neither remember what kind of exercise, nor what kind of need it was. What I remember is the sudden revelation that I can fulfil my needs not just by what others or I am doing for me - I can also choose to do something for others. By contributing to...

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Creativity – The Needs’ Year (Week 4)

Creativity – The Needs’ Year (Week 4)

Starting this project This blog post and this project – the Needs' Year – is an expression of my own creativity. I've had the idea of ​​the Needs' Year for about six months. Sometimes I am very quick in turning ideas into action, but this time I was preoccupied with...

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Rest – The Needs’ Year (Week 3)

Rest – The Needs’ Year (Week 3)

Rain and exhaustion "Fucking hell!" I had just got my third flat tyre in less than 24 hours. It was raining and I sought shelter under a pedestrian bridge along the river Schelde just outside Gent, Belgium. I was soaking wet and even though it was not so cold, my...

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